I've been working full-time as of late, so I've usually come home at around 6 every weekday with the intent to attempt something amazing.
I did successfully slog through the ample recording of a new rap song of mine titled "Welcome to the Sunrise" (available for listen through the following link), but other then that my newly purchased recording equipment has only fallen victim to subsequent recordings I find less than satisfying.
Work has been draining and demanding, but good for what it is nonetheless. Emotionally, I'm up and down.. occasionally pushing my head to hard in the pursuit of intellectual knowledge.. but I can't really complain about my situation overall. Besides; hard work, trial, and error are what makes a 'great.' So what if I feel myself challenged in most aspects of my life? I'm going to side with those who endure and say it's all going to pay dividends in one way or another in ways I can't even yet imagine.
I've had flashes of ideas for different subjects on which to write about on my blog.. but as of yet, nothing has come to fruition for the reason(s) already listed. Even if it takes until December or January, I promise that more substantial posts are on the way (and, knowing myself, writing this 'quick update' of sorts may very well lead to a substantial post later today, as I'll prove to myself that I'm certainly still willing and able to write).
Powell River is still somewhat of a stagnant heap for me at this point, with work being my only real dedication, as well as the only reason I'm still here. I haven't had much in the way of social outings or interactions outside of work and the internet due to everyone (including myself) being so Goddamn busy (or off in some other part of the globe, whether near or far). In all truth, I'd have to say life is a blank neutral, with it's minor pleasures and minor pains, but is neither very bad or very good. I find myself drinking a lot of tea throughout the week, and getting at least somewhat drunk during the weekend, during which time all of my hardships and pursuits seem to be made of insignificant straw in which it's like none of them really exist and everything is actually totally fine forever and ever. This doesn't change the fact that I return to these hardships in due time.
My anxiety has been pretty stagnant; although I did have a bout of it today after drinking a little too much coffee, and a bout of it last weekend when I made an outing to Downtown Vancouver while visiting family in White Rock for my late aunts funeral.
The Downtown Vancouver core.. at least in relation to me.. has this dark, foreboding, evil urban insecurity which just eats away at me.. like I'm drowning almost hopelessly in negative frequencies. There are very calm, zenned, and well-vibed pockets throughout the city (like Kitsilano), but for the most part it just feels angry and hopeless and painful.
I'm half-toying with the idea of dedicating myself to a completely healthy diet, with little to no deviation save from the occasional splurge on alcohol and one fast-food meal a month.. but it's still stuck on the precipice of 'is-it-worthwhile-or-would-I-rather-just-be-lazy-about-it-until-further-notice.'
Due to the amount of spare-time I find I have at work (and the nature of the work itself), I've been doing push-ups and crunches to help keep myself in shape while I hangout with the client. It seems to be working, but since the end of the summer I've neglected cardio workouts aside from plenty of walking (which isn't quite on-par with what constant biking did for me).
Anyways.. I do have plans tonight, thankfully, with a coworker to drink and eat plenty, as well as have long, in-depth intellectual conversation with different documentaries playing on the big-screen as backdrop. So I'm very much looking forward to that.
I just kinda wish I was in a place where I could spend my youth partying with friends my age, whether intellect is implied in the mix or not. It'll happen though. 9 more months till I make the jump to lightspeed.. er.. Victoria. It'll seem like no time in retrospect I'm sure. But in respect to looking forward.. it feels like a somewhat distant future.
Peace out, blue planet.
Have a great night.
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