So I'm a Harry Potter fan.
I really am. I read all the books... I grew up with the first three being read to me out loud by my father every night before bedtime.
And I absolutely love them. Each and every one of the books is an incredible work of literary genius.
I can't say the same for every movie, however... the naive acting of the 10 year old characters in the Sorcerers Stone aside, the Chamber of Secrets and the Prisoner of Azkaban are cinematic gems.
The fourth movie sucked. I'm going to be blatantly honest. It all felt far too forced and rushed, and the movie does absolutely no justice to the size and scope of the book.
The movie adaption of the Order of the Phoenix felt similar, save for a lack of its forced feeling. Its run and character development were, to say the least, much smoother than the attempts of its immediate predecessor.
I absolutely loved the Half-Blood Prince, both the book and movie equally. It seemed that whatever the issues of size had done to inhibit the quality of the previous two was entirely absent in the 6th installment.
This is where we come to the Deathly Hallows.
For one, I believe it easily could have been achieved in a single movie. In fact, if they had simply made it as long as the average running-time for a single Lord of the Rings film, it would have been that much more satisfying. But beyond that, Part 1 certainly didn't fail to reach its full artistic momentum... as it shouldn't have, considering it was the first half of a single book.
Throwing all of this aside, I saw Part 2 of the Deathly Hallows tonight, in case you couldn't take the hint from the posts title. And I have to say... Voldemort's character fucking pissed me off.
Perhaps it was a character flaw that existed even in the book, but I failed to notice it because the text left it up to my imagination to fill in any gaps (which it did wondrously, by the way). However, if that's the case, he wasn't a character that could be effectively moved from the page to the screen as he was the only one who caused me to lift the suspension on my disbelief without a regret or a second thought to the contrary.
He had, at an absolute minimum, a thousand obvious chances to kill Harry. Instead, he pulled a 'classic villian' and simply stood there, telling Harry how he was about to finish him off, and exactly how he was going to finish him off, giving Harry numerous chances to escape... which he took, unlike Voldemort.
After their apparent 'final duel' within the thick canvas of the Forbidden Forest, Harry is left seemingly motionless and dead on the ground. Instead of double checking himself to make sure the very bane of his existence was finally gone after 18 years of trying to destroy him, he decides not to stride several feet forwards and instead sends a doctor of some sort (with her loyalty obviously waning) to check for him.
(**SPOILER ALERT**) This doctor then proceeds to ask Harry's perceptibly dead body if 'Draco is alive,' to which dead Harry nods yes. As if thanking him, she turns to Voldemort to announce that the Boy who Lived has now died by his hand. Yaaaay for Voldemort...
So without even touching the body himself, he and his troupe march back to Hogwarts tainted by the swag of ultimate victory, but lol guess what Harry isn't dead.
Whilst staring at Harry in anger as he leaps back to life and out of Hagrid's arms, he waits until he has entered a sheltered stone hallway before shooting off a dangerous mix of black magic. GOOD TIMING, PAL.
He then chases after him, and they proceed to fight each other hand-to-hand while slipping in and out of objective reality. At one point, Voldemort simply slaps Harry in the fucking face.
Dude.
This is the guy who caused your original downfall.
This is the guy you've been obsessively hunting for the past 18 years.
You'd expect you'd really, really just want it finish it at this point. Fucking jab him with your wand until both of his kidneys give out. It's not like you ever fought fair anyways, and slapping someone is most definitely not a lethal blow.
And what ever happened to that good old avada kadavra curse? You've got nothing left to lose at this point... maybe third times the charm.
Anyways, Harry somehow turns the tables, kills Voldemort, and the good guys win the day yet again.
It's the ending I was hoping for, yes... but if that were real life, I would have jabbed Harry Potter in the motherfucking kidneys till he died.
The end.
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